2014 TSX Sport Wagon Maintenance Schedule

I feel kind of daft asking this, but I have a 2014 TSX Sport Wagon arriving tomorrow (!!) and the Acura Owners' web site has the world's most ludicrously complicated information about maintenance schedules. They list 7 different "maintenance minders." Heck, I just want to know how often I've got to take the car in to be examined. Every 5,000 miles? Every 3,500 miles?

What's the quick answer? What do you do?